Thinking

I am an over-thinker. I really am. I over think everything and worry about everything. With the realization that college is beginning and stuff that is out of my normal bubble is occurring I just don't know what to do. I am being thrown for a loop like a crazy man. I had my routines down and now they are gone and it is confusing the hell out of me. I really don't know what to do. Everything seems off and nothing seems right. My mom and I were texting and I started crying. All of a sudden Tasha is doing a lot more with a bunch of other people and it is really scaring me. It's what she wants so I have to get used to it and I just... I just... I don't know... She has seemed really distant lately and I know and she said it's because of all the stuff that is happening. But I think after we talked about it she realized what was going on in my head and she cuddled closer.

Sometimes I am just crazy. And sometimes life is really hard. And I think it is both of those right now. I am just completely overwhelmed. And some people may see what I am thinking as not that big of a deal or something but in my mind it is. I am not good with change. I really am not. It freaks me out completely. I am just really scared of what college is going to bring. I don't think I am scared of Tasha and I because I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I just have to get through these next four years so I can provide for us. Four years seems like a really long time right now... And I am scared.

Thanks for reading.